1/3/2024

Fall colours along the Squamish River.

I’m back at it. Work that is. It’s a funny place to be. Funny? Complicated maybe is the feeling.

Working in the film industry is pretty fun. I’ve managed to get myself involved in a couple crews that I like working with, this show coming up is definitely a fun crew. Just loading gear in from the rental house the past two days has been a nice, soft launch back into it. It’s promising to be a little bit of a hectic and hard show, but I think we will get through it well.

But, aside that I often enjoy the job, it has it’s downsides. Largely that I don’t drive home everynight. The long long hours mean that I choose to stay in my van, because I’m afraid I’d drive off a cliff on the Sea to Sky at night. Those same hours dictate that even if I did drive home everynight, it would be only to shower and turn around in the morning. I miss my family dearly while I’m working, when the strikes were on I got to spend so much more time at home, but I spent a lot of that time stressing out about cashflow and the uncertainty of when that was going to return. I found it hard to focus sometimes on the best parts of where I live (riding bikes, hikes, camping opportunities) just from being stressed out.

So returning to work I feel, complicated. Again, I count myself very privileged that I’m on a great crew that’s fun to work with (also a big budget show with the good pay-rates). I’m keen to start paying the unplanned debt off that was accrued during the strikes, but also the strikes were the longest stretch since we moved to Squamish where I actually slept in the bed in our home. If it’s not obvious, I miss that. If I didn’t miss that, I’d question the motives in my marriage.

So here I am, drinking tea and using the internet in a cafe in PoCo because driving home tonight will compile as the week goes on and truthfully spending the extra money on gas this particular week isn’t a budget consideration nor do I feel good about the idea of being a daily car commuter.

Anyways. I also sortof feel ill-prepared for this week of work. I want to bring a few more things to keep me occupied during downtime on set, or when we have some shorter days like today. I don’t want to drive home, but I don’t want to sit idly in the van watching TV on my phone. I have to admit too, I’m bummed I couldn’t push myself to scan some images last night in the slim time I had at home. Working through some scans would be a great way to spend the evenings where I can’t quite get to sleep yet. Goals for the upcoming weekend that is going to feel too short this week. Sun means I’ll get a good ride in on Sunday though, so I’m going to focus on that.